Bill Belichick Is Listening To Too Much Joe Rogan And Getting Rid Of All Of His Old Players

Have you ever tried DMT? Probably not, but Joe Rogan has and I’m starting to think Bill Belichick has too… As the sports world swirls in uncertainty Bill Belichick has decided to go on a vision quest to figure out how to kick start Version 3 of The Patriots Dynasty. HIs quest has lead him to start getting rid of all of the old players from Version 2 of the Patriots dynasty so they can turn over a new leaf. All of these recent event have got me thinking when Belichick isnt cutting up film and thinking about how to overthrow Rodger Goodell, he’s listening to The Joe Rogan Experience. Screen Shot 2020-03-23 at 9.19.10 PM

The wide array of guests Joe has on his show can sometimes get overwhelming, but after you listen to enough episodes you can catch on to a few reoccurring themes. Joe will talk about how he gets injections of PRP (Platelet Rich Plasma) or Mesenchymal stem cells to help stiff joints or torn ligaments, frequently telling his guests “I know a guy I’ll hook you up.” As if he were pushing some kind of longevity drug right out of his dorm room. Another one of those themes is Joe talking to his guests about getting on TRT (Testosterone Replacement Therapy,) which I don’t fully understand the science behind, but I do know Frank Thomas does those commercials where he posts up at the gym and gets a bunch of other dudes wives to hit on him.

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I don’t think Bill Belichick is concerned with the advances of other guys wives, unless they’re holding practice tapes of the Pats Week 6 opponent. I DO THINK Ol’ Billy is slamming PRP injections, loading up on Stem Cells, and going deep with the TRT all while getting excited to draft a QB in the 2021 draft.

I will say this, I may have to stop watching the NFL if Trevor Lawrence or Justin Fields end up in New England, because I don’t think I can watch another 15 plus years of the Patriots dominating the NFL, until Belichick dies on the sideline after winning his 14th Super Bowl. 

TRT, PRP, Stem Cells, and Joe Rogan have Belichick feeling young. All in the same week Tom Brady has left for Tampa Bay and Stephen Gostkowski was cut. Two of the most important pieces to the Patriots successes over the last 10 plus years will no longer be there. A younger Belichick may be exactly what the Patriots need, not some guy who doesn’t eat Strawberries or Tomatoes and some other guy who could never get out of the shadow of Adam Vinatieri. I feel like we get put into this position every other year, some crazy story comes out and everyone thinks the Patriots are done, they’re finally going to start declining, but it never happens. SURLEY this is finally the year the Patriots are done, right? Probably not. This may be exactly where the Pats want to be, nobody expects them to win the Super Bowl this year. I bet if the Pats went 3-13 everyone would be like, “well you know they lost Brady and they never went after an established QB,” or “Maybe this does mean Belichick was declining as a coach.” LCgif

Bob Kraft is probably laying on a massage table somewhere lamenting the loss of Tom Brady. Bill Belichick is sitting in his office at the Patriots facility getting a blood transfusion with a younger persons blood, blaring the most recent JRE, while simultaneously ripping a bowl of DMT so he can plan how hes going to monopolize the NFL again.

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